I Feel Unsafe in My Body
You might feel exposed, trapped, watched, shaky, frozen or unable to settle.
Your skin might feel uncomfortable. Your clothes may feel wrong. Your heartbeat might feel too noticeable. You may want to hide, cover yourself, keep moving or get away from your own physical sensations.
You do not have to explain why this is happening before you can do something that may help.
You do not have to force yourself to relax.
You do not have to close your eyes, take deep breaths, lie down or focus closely on your body.
For now, we are going to look for one small thing that gives you more support, space or choice.
You can follow every step, choose one step, simply read or leave this page open beside you.
You do not have to fix everything right now.
Image suggestion:
A quiet, softly lit room with a supportive chair beside a wall, a warm lamp, an open doorway, a folded blanket, water and a small tray of colourful mosaic pieces. Avoid including a visibly distressed person.
Alt text:
A softly lit room with a supportive chair, open doorway, folded blanket, water and colourful mosaic pieces.
First, Check What Kind of Safety You Need
Before trying to settle the feeling, take one moment to check whether something around you is actually unsafe.
You do not need to analyse the whole situation.
Ask yourself:
“Do I need to move away from something or someone right now?”
If someone is hurting, threatening, following or controlling you
This page is not asking you to calm down and remain where you are.
Move towards whatever gives you the best available protection.
That might mean moving towards:
An exit
A locked or more secure room
A trusted person
A neighbour
A staffed business
A well-lit public place
Emergency assistance
Take your phone, keys, essential medication, children or animals when you can do so safely.
You do not owe anyone an explanation before moving towards safety.
Call Triple Zero on 000 if you are in immediate danger in Australia.
If you have sudden or serious physical symptoms
Seek urgent medical help if you are experiencing a new or severe physical symptom, such as serious difficulty breathing, severe chest pain, sudden collapse or another medical emergency.
Do not assume that a serious physical symptom is only caused by stress.
Call Triple Zero on 000 for an ambulance in an emergency.
If your surroundings appear physically safe
Stay here for the next small step.
We are not going to argue with what you feel.
We are going to give you a few clear pieces of information about where you are, what is supporting you and what choices remain available.
Image suggestion:
A gentle illustration showing two pathways. One leads towards an open doorway and a lit public space. The other leads towards a supportive chair, blanket and grounding objects. Avoid warning symbols or alarming colours.
Alt text:
Two gentle pathways representing moving towards external safety or using grounding support in a physically safe place.
Start by Making One Thing More Supportive
Do not begin by trying to change how you feel.
Change one small part of your surroundings instead.
Choose one option that feels manageable:
Sit with your back against a wall or solid chair.
Stand where you can see the doorway.
Move away from anyone who feels too close.
Turn on a light.
Close or open a door.
Wrap a blanket around your shoulders.
Remove a tight or uncomfortable item of clothing.
Put both feet on the floor.
Hold a cushion in front of your chest or stomach.
Move into a quieter room.
Sit near another person without needing to talk.
You are not trying to create a perfect environment.
You are giving yourself one more point of support than you had a moment ago.
Sometimes this feeling builds gradually, even when there was no single moment that caused it.
You do not need to understand the whole build-up now.
Use This One-Minute “Return to Here” Exercise
Keep your eyes open if that feels better.
You do not need to search inside yourself. We are going to use the room around you.
Step One: Find One Solid Object
Choose a wall, table, floor, chair, bench or doorway.
Look at it.
Silently or aloud, say:
“That is solid.”
Notice its shape or colour.
You do not need to describe how it makes you feel. Just notice that it exists.
Step Two: Notice What Is Holding Your Weight
You might notice:
The floor under your feet
The chair underneath you
The wall behind your back
The bed supporting your legs
Your shoes around your feet
You do not have to scan your whole body.
Choose one place where you can notice support.
Say:
“Something is holding me up.”
Step Three: Name Three Ordinary Facts
Choose facts that do not require emotional interpretation.
For example:
“The wall is cream.”
“There is a window to my left.”
“The door is closed.”
“My phone is beside me.”
“I am sitting in a chair.”
“It is morning.”
Plain facts can help you reconnect with the place you are in without asking you to deny what you feel.
Step Four: Let One Breath Leave Gently
Do not force yourself to take a deep breath.
Simply allow your next breath to leave a little more slowly than usual.
You might breathe in normally and let the breath out slowly.
If focusing on breathing makes you feel worse, skip this step.
You can use sight, sound, movement or touch instead.
Step Five: Make One Small Choice
Choose something immediate and manageable.
You might say:
“I will stay here for another ten seconds.”
“I will stand up.”
“I will move closer to the doorway.”
“I will get a drink.”
“I will leave the light on.”
“I will stop this exercise now.”
The choice does not need to be impressive.
Being able to choose one small thing can matter when it feels as though choice has disappeared.
Image suggestion:
A close-up of clothed feet resting on the floor beside a sturdy chair. Include a warm lamp, a visible doorway and one textured object nearby. Keep the person’s identity out of view.
Alt text:
Clothed feet resting on the floor beside a sturdy chair, warm lamp, visible doorway and textured grounding object.
You Are Allowed to Keep Your Eyes Open
Many calming exercises tell people to close their eyes.
You do not have to do that.
You are allowed to:
Watch the doorway
Sit facing the room
Keep the lights on
Stand instead of sitting
Move instead of becoming still
Keep space around your body
Hold something between yourself and other people
Stop someone from touching you
Skip any instruction
End the exercise whenever you choose
Feeling calmer is not more important than feeling in control of what happens next.
You do not have to do this perfectly.
When Focusing on Your Body Makes It Worse
You do not have to focus on your heartbeat, stomach, breathing, muscles or skin.
Sometimes looking inward feels like too much.
Place your attention on something outside you instead.
Try This External Grounding Pattern
Find:
Five objects you can see
You might name a door, cup, lamp, shoe and window.
Four straight lines
Look for the edge of a table, window frame, shelf or floorboard.
Three separate sounds
Listen for a fan, traffic, birds, footsteps or the quiet hum of the room.
Two textures
Look at or touch fabric, wood, paper, ceramic, stone or another safe object.
One choice you can make
Choose whether to sit, stand, drink, move, continue or stop.
You do not have to search carefully.
You do not have to find the correct things.
The purpose is simply to give your attention somewhere steady to land.
When Touch Does Not Feel Safe
Do not force yourself to place your hands on your chest, face, stomach or arms.
You can ground yourself without touching your body.
Try one of these:
Hold a mug by its handle.
Grip the edges of a cushion.
Press your hands against a table.
Hold a smooth stone, piece of wood or ceramic tile.
Run one finger along the edge of a piece of paper.
Wrap your hands around a folded cloth.
Place your hands inside your sleeves.
Keep your arms beside you and use only your eyes.
You can also place an object nearby without touching it.
Look at its colour, shape, edges, marks and shadows.
There is no rule saying grounding must involve touching your skin.
Image suggestion:
A simple arrangement of a folded cloth, smooth ceramic tile, wooden shape, paper, warm mug and small cushion. Keep the surface uncluttered and avoid sharp objects.
Alt text:
Gentle grounding objects including folded fabric, ceramic, wood, paper, a warm mug and a small cushion.
When Stillness Feels Unsafe
You do not have to sit quietly.
Sometimes it feels better to move before trying to become still.
Choose one repetitive movement:
Walk slowly between two points.
Rock gently while sitting.
Shift your weight from one foot to the other.
Press your feet down and release.
Push your hands against a wall.
Roll a small object across a table.
Tear scrap paper into strips.
Sort objects by colour.
Draw repeated lines across a page.
Place and remove mosaic pieces.
Fold and unfold a cloth.
Tap alternating fingers against a table.
Keep the movement simple enough that you do not have to make many decisions.
You are not trying to exercise the feeling away.
You are giving the restless energy somewhere contained to go.
If the movement becomes uncomfortable, make it smaller or slower.
Stopping is also allowed.
When You Feel Frozen or Unable to Move
You do not need to force yourself into a large movement.
Look for the smallest action available.
You might:
Blink deliberately once.
Move your eyes towards a doorway.
Press one toe into your shoe.
Move one finger.
Swallow.
Loosen your jaw slightly.
Make a quiet sound.
Read one sentence aloud.
Send a full stop or single symbol to someone you trust.
A tiny movement still counts as movement.
A tiny choice still counts as choice.
Take as long as you need between actions.
Try Steady Pressure
Some people find chosen, steady pressure easier than light or unexpected touch.
You could try:
Pressing your feet into the floor
Leaning your back against a wall
Holding a firm cushion
Sitting beneath a folded or weighted blanket
Pressing your hands against a table
Wrapping yourself in a comfortable shawl or jacket
Sitting where you can see two solid walls
Use only pressure that feels comfortable and easy to stop.
Avoid anything painful, extreme or difficult to remove.
You decide how much pressure to use and when it ends.
Image suggestion:
A person shown from behind sitting comfortably against a solid wall with a cushion and folded blanket nearby. Keep the doorway visible and avoid showing restraint or confinement.
Alt text:
A person sitting with their back supported by a wall, with a cushion, folded blanket and visible doorway nearby.
Use Words That Feel Believable
You do not have to tell yourself, “I am safe,” if that does not feel true.
Use words that are neutral and believable.
Try:
“I am here in this room.”
“The door is beside me.”
“My feet are on the floor.”
“I can keep my eyes open.”
“I can move away.”
“I can stop.”
“I do not have to understand this yet.”
“I only need to get through this minute.”
“I can choose what happens next.”
Choose one sentence that feels possible.
You do not need to believe it perfectly.
You are simply giving yourself one clear sentence to return to when everything feels crowded.
Image suggestion:
A handwritten card beside a small lamp and grounding objects. The card reads, “I can keep my eyes open. I can stop. I can choose what happens next.”
Alt text:
A handwritten grounding card reading, “I can keep my eyes open. I can stop. I can choose what happens next.”
Try a Gentle Temperature Change
A mild temperature change can give your attention a clear physical point without requiring you to examine your whole body.
You might:
Hold a comfortably warm mug.
Place a cool cloth on the back of your neck.
Wash your hands in comfortably warm water.
Stand near an open window.
Hold a cool drink.
Move into a warmer or cooler room.
Wrap yourself in a blanket.
Avoid anything painfully hot, freezing or extreme.
The aim is not to shock yourself.
Choose a sensation that feels ordinary, clear and manageable.
Come Create With Me: Make a Small Boundary
This is not about producing artwork.
It is a simple placing activity for moments when you need somewhere for your attention and hands to go.
You can use:
Mosaic pieces
Paper scraps
Buttons
Pebbles
Bottle caps
Pencils
Leaves
Fabric
Any other safe objects nearby
You do not need glue.
Step One: Choose a Small Working Space
Use a piece of paper, placemat, tray, book cover or clear section of a table.
This is the area you will work inside.
Step Two: Make an Outside Edge
Place objects around the edge of the space.
You could create:
A square
A circle
A rough border
Four separate corners
One simple line
The pieces do not need to match.
The boundary does not have to be completely closed.
Step Three: Choose One Centre Object
Place one object somewhere inside the border.
Let it be different from the others if you like.
You do not have to decide what it represents.
It is simply the next piece.
Step Four: Add One Piece at a Time
Before placing each piece, notice:
Its colour
Its size
Whether it is smooth or rough
Where you would like it to go
Place it down.
Pause.
Choose another piece only when you are ready.
Step Five: Stop Before It Feels Like Work
You do not have to fill the space.
You do not have to glue anything down.
You can move every piece again.
You can leave the arrangement unfinished.
You can put the materials away.
You can also sit and look at the pieces without touching them.
The purpose is not to make something beautiful.
The purpose is to spend a few minutes making small, visible choices.
This feeling does not always come from one moment. You can notice whether it returns without needing to solve the pattern today.
Image suggestion:
An overhead view of a small tray containing a simple border made from colourful mosaic pieces, paper shapes, buttons and pebbles. Place one larger object in the centre and show hands resting nearby.
Alt text:
A simple boundary made from mosaic pieces, paper, buttons and pebbles, with one larger object placed in the centre.
No Materials? Follow a Shape
Choose a rectangular object such as a window, door, screen, book or picture frame.
Let your eyes follow one edge.
Then the next edge.
Then the next.
Then the final edge.
You can breathe normally while doing this.
Repeat once if it feels helpful.
You can also:
Count the corners.
Notice where light meets shadow.
Find the darkest colour.
Find the lightest colour.
Look for a small mark or uneven edge.
Name the material the object is made from.
You are giving your eyes a predictable path to follow.
Nothing else is required.
The Quiet Two-Minute Version
Use this when you do not want to read the whole page.
Look: Find the doorway or another clear point in the room.
Support: Notice the chair, wall or floor holding your weight.
Name: Say three ordinary facts about where you are.
Release: Let one breath leave gently without forcing a deep breath.
Choose: Decide whether to stay, move, drink, contact someone or stop.
That is enough for now.
You can repeat it or leave it there.
After the Strongest Part Has Passed
Do not immediately demand that you return to normal.
Give yourself a gentle transition.
You might:
Drink some water.
Eat something simple.
Change into more comfortable clothing.
Adjust the temperature.
Sit somewhere with a clear view of the doorway.
Reduce noise or bright light.
Put on familiar music or a familiar program.
Move to a different room.
Wash your face or hands.
Sit near a trusted person without talking.
Rest before making decisions.
You may feel tired, shaky, emotional, blank or frustrated afterwards.
You do not have to judge the way your body responded.
For the next little while, choose what feels steady, not what looks productive.
Image suggestion:
A glass of water, simple snack, folded comfortable clothing and a familiar book or television remote arranged on a quiet table.
Alt text:
Water, a simple snack, comfortable clothing and familiar items prepared for a gentle transition after a difficult moment.
Make a Small Plan for Another Day
Only do this when you have enough space to think.
Write three short notes somewhere easy to find.
What Helps Me Feel More Supported?
For example:
Having my back against a wall
Keeping the lights on
Seeing the doorway
Holding a firm cushion
Walking
Holding a warm mug
Sorting objects
Listening to familiar music
Having someone nearby
What Should Other People Avoid Doing?
For example:
Touching me unexpectedly
Standing over me
Blocking the doorway
Asking many questions
Telling me to calm down
Turning off the lights
Following me when I move away
Who Could I Contact?
Choose one person or service you could contact without needing to explain everything.
You might prepare this message:
“I feel very unsettled and need someone to stay connected with me for a few minutes. You do not need to fix it.”
You are not committing yourself to using the plan.
You are simply leaving a clearer path for another difficult moment.
If you notice this feeling comes up often, it is okay to pay quiet attention to what happens beforehand and what gives you even a small amount of relief.
You do not have to investigate or explain it before you are ready.
Follow Along, Just Watch or Pause
A guided Come Create With Me session can be used in whichever way feels most manageable.
You can:
Follow every step
Watch without participating
Turn the sound down
Keep your eyes on the room
Pause whenever you need to
Use your own materials
Skip the creative activity
Leave and return later
Stop completely
No special supplies are required.
Paper, pencils, safe household objects, mosaic pieces, leaves, fabric or simple visual observation are all valid.
You do not have to keep pace with the person on the screen.
You can come back to the session whenever you need it.
When This Page Is Not Enough
This page cannot protect you from another person, replace urgent medical attention or provide emergency intervention.
Call Triple Zero on 000 if you are in immediate danger or experiencing a serious medical emergency in Australia.
If you feel overwhelmed, are experiencing a crisis or are struggling to stay safe, you can contact Lifeline by calling 13 11 14, texting 0477 13 11 14 or using Lifeline Crisis Chat.
You do not need to wait until you can explain everything clearly before asking for help.
Image suggestion:
A phone beside a glass of water, folded blanket and handwritten note reading, “You do not have to explain everything before asking for help.”
Alt text:
A phone beside water, a folded blanket and a note reading, “You do not have to explain everything before asking for help.”
You Only Need One Small Next Step
You do not have to make your whole body feel safe right now.
You do not have to fix the reason this is happening.
You do not have to calm down on command.
Find one solid object.
Notice one point of support.
Name one ordinary fact about where you are.
Make one small choice.
Then decide whether you want another step.
You can come back to this page anytime.
You can follow along, simply watch or leave it open beside you.
You are allowed to go slowly.
You are allowed to stop.
For this moment, one small piece of steadiness is enough.
Image suggestion:
A warm table near a window with a partly completed mosaic border, soft fabric, water and a card reading, “One small piece of steadiness is enough.” Keep the arrangement reassuringly unfinished.
Alt text:
A partly completed mosaic border beside water and a card reading, “One small piece of steadiness is enough.”
Important Note
This page provides general grounding and emotional-regulation ideas. It does not diagnose conditions, provide therapy or replace medical care, emergency assistance or personalised professional support.
Use only the steps that feel appropriate and physically safe.
Stop any activity that increases pain, dizziness, breathing difficulty, distress or a sense of danger.
Important Support Information
This page offers a simple activity for difficult moments. It does not replace emergency assistance, medical care or personalised support.
If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 000.
If you are overwhelmed, in crisis or need someone to listen without judgement, Lifeline is available 24 hours a day:
Call: 13 11 14
Text: 0477 13 11 14
Online chat:
https://www.lifeline.org.au/crisis-chat/
You are allowed to seek practical help.
You are allowed to move towards safety.
You do not have to carry the whole moment by yourself.